I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
