considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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