what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
