We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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