I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
