you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize