sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
nutella sex= disaster
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
