I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize