the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
she told me i tasted like america
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
