Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Randomize
