bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Randomize
