Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Randomize
