it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize
