We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
just tell him i said nine months
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
Randomize
