He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
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