Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
