There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize
