There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
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