NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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