btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
