Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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