I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
