Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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