You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
