So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
