I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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