I wish you could order shots online.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
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