Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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