I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
