Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
