my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
