i don't like sucking hair
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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