your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Randomize
