what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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