So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize