hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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