Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
