He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Randomize
