Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(806): View more from Texas

I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.

(512): View more from Texas

Did it?

(806): View more from Texas

Not as such, no.

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(740): View more from Ohio

I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.

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(904): View more from Florida

You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."

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(372): View more from

They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY

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