For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Randomize
