I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Randomize
