So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
i think i have two assholes
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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