I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
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