Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
