is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Randomize
