Small penises have feelings too.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
