there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Damn victory sex feels great
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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