either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
She said her name was "party"
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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