You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize