i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
don't judge my taste in strippers
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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