i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
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